(no subject)

[hot_mess_express]

Who: You
When: Day 52, morning
Where: Anywhere

[Of course there's still the flowers that, when stepped on, enhance or dull a sense, and there are still some chocolates in the lounge if you missed them or want more.

But this morning dawns with an infestation of bats.

That is, tiny tiny clockwork bats that get in your hair and coffee and make tiny tiny clockwork bat screeches.

Should you encounter a clockwork bat, and they're pretty hard to dodge, the next person you talk to will... Well, see one of your memories.

Otherwise it seems like a pretty typical morning, and the bats will be gone by afternoon.]

Comments

[bad_crowmance]

You're definitely lucky.

[ He winks at Rean. ]

But that still doesn't sound like you're gonna stop keeping things bottled up.

[awakenerd]

It's not like I'm trying to exclude you or anything.

[bad_crowmance]

I know you're not.

[ Crow sighs. ]

Just.... forget about it. Offer's open if you want it.

[ It's not like Crow doesn't get it, anyway.

He ruffles Rean's hair again, pulling back from the hug. ]

[awakenerd]

Crow....

[He catches Crow's wrist.]

I don't want to forget about it. When you treat me like I'm just another person, it means the world to me.

I'm not trying to dismiss you, or your concern.

[bad_crowmance]

[ Crow looks at the hand wrapped around his wrist. ]

Of course you're a person.

[ He wouldn't say "just another" one, though. Rean is...

Anyway. ]

Being a Divine Knight doesn't change that, it just means there's a little extra added on. It's relevant, but it's not even close to being the most interesting thing about you. You're kind, overly sappy, and the kind of guy who tries his best to be there for everyone. Even at the cost of himself.

And that's the part that makes people worry.

[ That's the part that makes him worry. ]

[awakenerd]

It's worrying you that I want to avoid. There doesn't seem to be a good way not to.

...It's not like I want to keep secrets, but there's also things I don't want to talk about. That maybe I don't know how to talk about.

But if that worries you more, then I can try.

[bad_crowmance]

You know, if you're not comfortable with specifics that's fine too? It's not like I talk about everything either.

[ He is, perhaps shockingly, very self-aware about that. ]

What I don't like is the idea that you're suffering alone. I don't need to know the specifics, not if that'll hurt you worse. But remembering shit like that's traumatic. It's okay to just say you need some company without telling me more.

I feel like... if I didn't realize you were suffering, then I haven't been a good friend to you. And that's what bothers me. You've always been here for me but I haven't been there for you. Feels kinda uneven.

[awakenerd]

It's not like I've been silently suffering or anything...

[He sighs.]

You know I'm supposed to be the one providing support... As it is I think you're underselling yourself. You being you all the times is really heartening. It isn't like I sit around and brood when no one is looking. I'm not faking it when we have fun together. I don't feel alone. I feel blessed to have you in my life, bringing everything you bring to it, every day.

You already give me so much Crow. If anything is uneven, I feel like I haven't done enough. You make me happy. And because you do, I don't want you to feel like I'm trying to shut you out.

[bad_crowmance]

Then just tell me you'll lean on me when you need me. I don't need to know the details, you don't even need to tell me you're doing it. Just promise me and I'll believe you.

[ Because, Crow has slowly come to realize as he's spent more and more time with Rean, he trusts him implicitly. ]

[awakenerd]

I think I can do that. Or try at least.

[Noticing he's being hit on and relying on others, Rean's two biggest weaknesses.]

[bad_crowmance]

Alright then, from now on I'll only bug you when I'm really worried.

[ So like, you've been warned. ]

Oh and uh, one other thing.

[awakenerd]

It's not like I mind you being sweet any time...

What is it?

1/3

[bad_crowmance]

Alright, listen closely because I'm only gonna say this one.

[bad_crowmance]

[ He shifts position so he is, for at least the moment, holding onto Rean's hand-- the one that had been holding his wrist-- with both of his own. ]

...You're not "just" another person to me. You're Rean Schwarzer, my friend, my partner, the person who challenges me most. The guy who makes me want to try harder to be the best version of myself. You're.... one of the most important parts of my life. And I'm glad you're by my side.

Done.

[bad_crowmance]

[ And then he drops Rean's hand and rubs the back of his head, looking mildly embarrassed but feeling decidedly moreso over their bond. ]

Aaaaaanyway, that's enough sappiness out of me. Possibly for the next year or so. At least.

[awakenerd]

[Oh.

He smiles softly, touched, a little wistful, and leans forward to just brush his lips over Crow's. A kiss but not a lewd one by any means. Just very soft before pulling back.]

Thank you. That means more to me than you know.

[It makes him happy and sad, sets his heart aflutter, gives him a lot of feelings, but he's genuinely grateful to hear it, even if he's not sure he deserves it, he won't reject it. Because Crow's important to him.]

[bad_crowmance]

[ Crow gives him a sidelong smile. ]

I get the impression you needed to hear it, at least once.

[ And that's likely the closest he's getting to a confession for a while, barring extenuating circumstances. ]

[awakenerd]

I wouldn't mind hearing it again, if you ever felt like saying it.

[Look he just promised to try to be more open, sort of.]

[bad_crowmance]

I think we can work something out.

[ But don't think he didn't notice those sad feelings. ]

[awakenerd]

[They have nothing to do with not liking the sap though!]

I'd like that.

[bad_crowmance]

[ Yes, but they exist which makes them worth remembering and carefully recalibrating his responses. ]

You really are sappy, aren't you?

[ It's said fondly. ]

[awakenerd]

[Don't do that??]

You caught me.

[bad_crowmance]

[ It's doesn't mean no nice things, just wording them more carefully. It's fine. ]

Your real secret weakness has been revealed-- soft feelings.

[awakenerd]

And I'm so very careful not to show it, however did you find out?

[bad_crowmance]

Because I am secretly a criminal mastermind, so brilliantly clever that I can figure out anyone's motives.

[ Well, parts of that are true anyway. ]