(no subject)

[joybound]

Who: you??
When: Day 48, evening and night
Where: the library and beyond

[As sun sets today, everyone will receive a message on their Chain:

☆: Good Evening my precious, charming heroes!
☆: It's been awhile since we had a party, so I was thinking you guys could use a pick-me-up.
☆: If you're interested, come down to the library ♥

Should you take the suggestion, you'll find the library has been decked out in fairy lights, with pink glittery star-shaped decorations all around. In the hallway are tables with trays of fruit tarts and fizzy drinks, and there's cheerful electronic music playing over the intercom.

In the center of the library, there's a new hexagonal bookshelf, accessible from every angle. It spins, allowing passengers to browse without bumping eachother around, and on it are a new collection of books. Some you might recognize from home -- if you ever wrote a book yourself, or had one written about you, it's here. Everything from formal biographies to grade school story projects has been brought in, in a delightfully embarrassing celebration of the passengers.

And if that wasn't enough to make you blush, there's also a slew of new books about you... The trains Heroes have been written in to a variety of fairy tales. In one story, you may find yourself a knight on a white horse rescuing your teammate and riding off into the sunset. In another you're a fairy godmother. You may even be a witch or a dragon! Given enough time, you'll probably find a story that puts you in just about every role, in a cast with just about every other passenger, teammate or no.

Be careful, though -- at random chance, reading a story about yourself might make you feel like acting out that role in real life! Those effected by this will consider other characters from that story to be their roles as well -- if your teammate was your Prince Charming in the story, you'll think they are in real life! All in a harmless, bond-promoting way, of course. This effect will wear off after an hour or so, and one character can be afflicted multiple times.

Will you get lovingly teased by over-the-top fanfiction? Probably. Will the library be covered in glitter forever? Definitely. Is it worth it...?

Well. Prince Cardamom thinks so. He's also joined in for the night, and will gladly play out stories with you, or face your ire. Enjoy the party!]

[[OOC: There's a prince toplevel here, though as always threads are subject to mod energy levels. If you'd like to handwave your character asking questions/etc, please feel free to poke Cleo#9893 @ discord and I'll work out what kind of information you might get! Thank you!]

Comments

[voreaciously]

Assistant! You're late. [she sighs like this is just a thing he does because he do and also.]

Very well, we will go over Operation Candyland once more.

[she stretches out a pointer and taps the whiteboard to command his attention.]

Using the raygun I have constructed and a number of satellite relays, I will transmogrify the continent into various rare and irresistibly delicious confections.

[yep]

There is also a three-step plan in which we will control the world's economy, but I shan't bore you with the details. Ah, not to worry, I have also not forgotten your casino country, naturally. Even if your uniform concepts are...ahem. After all is said and done, I plan to settle down in a nice cottage with a harem of individuals who will naturally fall for my scintillating wit and intellect. I will certainly put the chocolate to excellent effect.

[Her expression is a little lewd for a moment before it darkens.]

We need only stop that dastardly Rean Schwarzer.

[bad_crowmance]

[ This is amazing. ]

Of course! But how do we stop someone of Rean's... caliber?

1/2

[voreaciously]

[she starts to pace]

Yes...he has been quite a thorn in my side...escaping my traps and destroying my precious, darling dolls. [she pauses and frowns sheepishly]

Certainly, I had a lengthy speech on one occasion, b-but that was one time! I quite liked it too, I thought we had him.

[But she has to think...outside the box.]

2/2

[voreaciously]

Assistant! You are quite an attractive man!

[bad_crowmance]

I'm so glad you noticed.

[ His tone is dry. He knows where she's going but he wants to hear her say it. ]

[voreaciously]

[she doesn't notice the dryness too caught up in her ABSOLUTELY AWESOME PLAN, THANKS.]

You must seduce him. It should be an easy task, no? [she rubs her hands, excited for this turn of events.]

After that, perhaps he can be made more sympathetic to our cause, or at last we can be rid of him! Yes! I am brilliant, a veritable genius!

[bad_crowmance]

Seduce Rean, huh? Sure, I'm willing to give it a shot.

1/2

[voreaciously]

Splendid, splendid! I will be certain to make it worth your while if you do not fail me.

Good...that Schwarzer will not know what hit him. [A beat.]

Or I suppose he might.

[ayyyyyy]

Fufufufufu.

2/2

[voreaciously]

Seriously, though. [she adjusts her monocle.]

You are stupidly attractive. I am a little alarmed.

[her tone is light and confused like, yeah, she's just realising this. whoa]

Re: 2/2

[bad_crowmance]

I can't help it, it's my blessing and my curse.

[voreaciously]

Fascinating. How is it a curse?

[bad_crowmance]

[ His tone could be mistaken for completely serious if you didn't know him. ]

Because when you're this attractive.... sometimes people think you're only a pretty face. And none of them try to get to know the real me.

[voreaciously]

[yeah she's an idiot genius overlord

so she like, lowers her voice to a whisper when he imparts this information to her, gasping.]

I had no idea.

[she grips his shoulder]

Your life must be truly difficult. What a cross to bear.

[hey i hate this thread.]

[bad_crowmance]

[ Crow is having a blast right now. He moves his hand on top of the one on his shoulder. ]

It's truly difficult... but your faith in me had made it all a little easier to handle.

[voreaciously]

[80H's voice grows more heated, more determined as she comes to grips with the situation.]

Yes...yes I do believe in you! You are very cunning and capable and make delightful finger sandwiches, you are definitely not just an exceptionally pretty face!

[bad_crowmance]

You're right! And I'll prove it to the world! ....Right after I seduce Rean per your brilliant plan!

[voreaciously]

A world that will soon be under our control. [She laughs to the side of her hand.] OHOOHOHOHOH!

But, ah, yes, it is rather brilliant, is it not? Someone so...[she grimaces] straightlaced is sure to be overwhelmed.

[get rekt rean!!!!]

Let us go over the particulars: how do you mean to proceed?

[bad_crowmance]

Well, I figured I'd start with flirting.

[voreaciously]

You flirt with everyone, though, even the enemy. [She ponders, thoughtfully.]

Or perhaps that is my own personal bias.

[bad_crowmance]

Yeah, but the difference is making a concentrated effort.

[voreaciously]

There's a difference?

[she is like, almost prepared to take notes.]

Interesting! Please, continue.

[bad_crowmance]

Of course. There's casual flirting and then there's "hey, I'm seriously into you" flirting. If I step it up, that'll be the first step. And when he gets I'm interested, I can move onto the next step-- wooing. Theow in a little romance, wine and dine....

[voreaciously]

[She flips over the whiteboard and starts to take notes. Included is a very cute, unrealistically evil drawing of Rean "Fuddy-Duddy" Schwarzer and a super fabulous drawing of Crow. With sparkles.

She's very good at this.

But she makes notes of what he's said so far, and writes "Stage" next to them, complete with number.]

How far will you need to go, I wonder...?

[bad_crowmance]

Well... depending on circumstances, I may need to call you in for... a threesome.

[voreaciously]

E-eh?!

[she raises a hand to her mouth, scandalised, but like in a way that's still clearly very curious.]

A threesome? Really?! Assistan, I am not sure I will be any good at that...